FATHER’S DAY, Who started it?

By Gopalakrishnan Naduvathery

This year Father’s Day is celebrated on the 21^st of June.  Like Woman’s Day, Father’s Day provides opportunity to all fathers of the world to feel proud of being somebody in the society; bequeathing fatherhood and male parenting a place in the sun to recognize the immanent value and emanate the enshrouded meaning of the concept of patriarch.    How did it dawn on the social horizon, who created it, and extended impelling publicity to such an extent that it spreads across the world like wild fire? How did it become a movement in human society?  

On the 19.06.1910 daughter of a civil war veteran, by name Sonora Smart Dodd, organized the first Father’s Day function in Spokane, Washington at the YMCA. She was born in Arkansa.  She was very fond of her father William Jackson Smart, held him in high esteem, and proudly spoke about him whenever opportunity arose. When Sonora was 16, her mother died on childbirth leaving the sixth child to be raised by the father, of course, along with Sonora.  Sonora was the only daughter – the eldest – with five brothers including the newly born infant, Marshal. As a single parent William raised all children, of course, with the help of elder daughter Sonora. All the fathers of the world must be thankful to Sonora for her resplendent resourcefulness to recognize the immanent value of fatherhood and male parenting, and for making it perceptible as an occasion for celebration all over the world.  With her pageantry spirit all the fathers are sanctified with an opportunity of embellishment of pleasantness, a haughty temperament, and a sense of belonging, filling their world with genuine excitement in the enchanting closeness of relationships and the process of rumination of the fragrance of fatherhood. This is a day for the fathers to be proud of their existence, as they are adored and sought after by their children, and family members to celebrate the occasion.

More than 110 countries celebrate Father’s Day in the world in order to honor paternity.  The date of celebration, however, varies from country to country.  Like Children’s Day, Sibling’s Day, Mother’s Day, Parents Day, Grand Parents Day, and so on, it is celebrated annually.  It enables fathers to introspect and relish the inherent importance of fatherhood, and above all it persuades the children and the family members to participate in the celebration along -+

While hearing about the Mother’s Day at Central Methodist Episcopal Church, Sonora was unable to restrain her enthusiasm to distinguish fatherhood as well, as she felt that fathers too needs recognition, keeping in mind the role played by her father as a role model.  Following her instincts, though she is an individual, she approached the Spokane Ministerial Alliance and suggested her father’s birthday, June 5, to be celebrated as the Father’s Day finally to become a day for all the fathers of the world.  Alliance did not accept her proposal as it is, instead, chose the third Sunday of June as the day for Father’s Day. 

The idea became popular and in 1966 President Lyndon B Johnson signed a Presidential Proclamation declaring the third Sunday of June as the Father’s Day.  Later President Nixon established the practice of a permanent national observance and celebration of Father’s Day on the third Sunday of June every year.  Sonora Dodd was honored at Expo 74 The World’s Fair, in Spokane in 1974 for her vision of aggrandizing human values and relationships in human society.  After four years she died at the age of ninety-six.  All the fathers must be thankful to her for the initiative and the contribution she has made towards recognition of fatherhood of the world.  

Catholic countries of Europe celebrate Father’s Day on the 19^th of March since middle ages.  This celebration was brought by the Spanish and Portuguese to Latin America, where March 19 is still in use, though many countries in Europe and America have adopted the U.S date, which is the third Sunday of June every year.  It is, however, celebrated on various dates in many parts of the world, most commonly in the months of March, April, and June, according to the custom of the home countries.   It complements similar celebrations among family members, as in case of Mother’s Day, Sibling’s Day, Grand Parents Day, and so on. 

What do the fathers feel about the day? A survey reveals that 47%, the highest score, of fathers look for at least a phone call, if not physical company, of children on this day. It is the pleasantness of “a proud feeling of the moment leading to our emotional transmigration”, some of the fathers felt,  “You feel you are a leader, a supporter, and a teacher to someone.” Thus, the fathers are saved from a job often unacknowledged, devoid of recognition, and subject to diminution as age advances. Father’s Day bridges the gap to a certain extent.

A father is not in any way inferior to a mother except for the abounds of emotions and the pent-up sentiments the motherhood carries eternally, and of course, the physical minutiae? How do you rate a father compared with a mother, when both are poles apart for a variety of reasons? As a matter of fact, both are a part and parcel of human life, both have its own distinct intricacies.   Father is the originator of life and the mother is the medium, the pipe-line and the real executor of fatherhood in letter and spirit.  Without fatherhood no motherhood and without motherhood no fatherhood can come to existence. Both have to sustain together in reality, and there is no possibility of a lone existence. It is said by experts that mothers take emotional decision, following the commands of their mind, while fathers take intellectual decision – without prejudice to motherhood – with a long-term perspective.  A father, after initial company with the mother and child, may set forth to attend office, and be with his usual activity of life, not because of any laxity in the attachment with the mother and child, whereas the mother may, if convinced, throw away her job and get rid of her professional commitments for the sake of the child.  This is not merely because he is in any way less attached with the mother and child, as commonly understood, but it is due to an intrinsic awareness that emotions cannot fill stomachs, of the family he loves. Fathers are more result oriented while mothers are profit oriented, it is commonly understood.

Fathers do yearn to be with the mother and child by all means, yet, they may most often prefer submission to the compulsions of life to conciliation with the emotional pulls, conferring due credence to the well-being of the mother and child.  Having mollified his own emotions, he may resort to something we can call matured thinking.  However, over the years human society has undergone incredible social and administrative transformation.  Participation of fathers in parenting has witnessed phenomenal expansion in the families. Administratively many countries have actually started ensuring paternal support to the fathers by extending paternity leave to keep up with their spirit of participation in parenting, and the need of the families transmigrating into the nucleus structure day by day.  In Sweden for example paternity leave up to 90 days is allowed, and the wife and husband together can avail total 480 days of leave. Many other countries have also established paternity leave to recognize fatherhood and male parenting. So here is a world emerging of happy parenting together and that is a lot for the mother, father and the child can expect to celebrate together.

Hitherto fathers have been silent sufferers, as the weight of motherhood generally overpowered the concept of fatherhood, and the father, after the initial company of the mother and child finely exhibit their mettle with masculinity.  However, with the compulsive compromise with emotions, fathers go through something called ‘toxic masculinity’, where their masculinity does not permit them to be expressive with their emotions, and feelings, and they are forced to suppress them, as though they are intoxicated. The capability of fathers to suppress emotions is recognized the world over.  

Do fathers have the same sentimental reasons to celebrate the Father’s Day like mothers in a Mother’s Day? Many men continue to disdain this day in the name of controversy and commercialism.  There were meddlesome reactions from many, stamping Father’s Day as a finicky concept lacking demure and lucidity, which they felt, needs emendation. They allege that attempts are being made to promote masculinism and commercialization to sell more masculine products for celebrations and gift exchanges.  Cadaverous minds among men alleged that it is a commercial and marketing gimmick to sell more products – in fact all celebrations lead to some sort of commercialization for sure – as celebrations do intensify the demand for goods apposite for the occasion, often paid by the fathers themselves.  In the 1920s and 1930s a movement did emerge venturing to scrap Mother’s Day and Father’s Day altogether in order to make a single day to be celebrated as Parents’ Day. The activists in New York reminded that both the parents must be honored and respected together, and not in isolation.  The great depression, however, derailed the attempt to decommercialize the celebrations.  The struggling retailers and advertisers, however, multiplied their efforts to make Father’s Day a second Christmas day in order to ensure augmentation of the markets for men’s accessories like neck-ties, shoes, shirts, perfumes, and so on. 

While it will be an  ardent idea to celebrate both Mother’s and Father’s Day together as Parents Day, socially justifiable because it inculcates togetherness, especially a much needed affair today, yet, from commercial and marketing points of views, separate celebration is the call of the day, as it increases the elasticity of demand for business growth and overall economic development. All said and done, it is a real consolation for the fathers of the world.

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HEARTBEATS : Gandhi – A Rare Human.

Dedication: To my mother beloved who, I am sure, holds my hands eternally.

October 2, 1869, Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was born. 2019 October 2we celebrate his 150th birthday. The world has seen more powerful leaders who could destroy humans at will, with the use of muscle, money, position, and what not. All those really appear so silly, compared with this frail man with nothing at his disposal except the mind of a human. He proved that non-violence and peace are no less powerful weapons than tyranny, oppression, and organised crime. He opened up most enduring and novel methods of conquests for humanity, especially the oppressed and the weak to follow in life. He has proved that no power on earth can resist the aroused and disciplined spirit of men who are determined and prepared to die for their ideology. Gandhi was prepared to die for his ideology, and that was his core strength.

When he was shot down on a Friday the 30^th January 1948, he was already much above an individual, a family, in fact he had become a legend, larger than life, and his departure really gave an impression that an army or a nation has collapsed. Thanks to Gurudev Rabindranath Tagore who gave him the apt title ‘father of the nation’. In fact, Gandhi deserved to be called ‘father of humanity’.

With his departure humanity lost an extra ordinarily precious life, and a source of inspiration to millions that came to an abrupt end. Extra ordinary lives have always been subjected to inhuman attacks and systematic annihilation in human society. It has happened with Joan of Arc, Martin Luther King Jr., Galileo, and many others who have stood for truth-absolute truth, beyond the comprehension of common psyche. Even the Son of God The Jesus was not spared.

The demise of The Mahatma created shock waves all over the world. Tears were unstoppable even in the eyes of those who had not seen him in real life. They wept as if they had lost a close relative. The UN lowered its flag, 110 countries mourned his departure from three to seven days. Government of India received 3441 and odd condolence messages from foreign nationals. Such a big respect and reverence for a man who held no position of authority, had no distinction of scientific or academic achievement to his credit, except that he was a simple, true, and rare human being.

A real leader has to always take extra ordinary decisions contrary to the prevailing customs and practices in the society matching with the his own ideology, and such disciplined approach only make him a leader par excellence. A true leader does things differently, of course, and The Mahatma has exhibited this exemplary quality through his own life as an example.

Employing an untouchable at his home, at a time when untouchability was vehement in the society, relinquishing insurance policies and gifts worth thousands of rupees, much against the wishes of family members, fitting to a Vishnavite (a follower of Lord Vishnu), much against the wishes of family members, and in accordance with the real principles of Hinduism as proclaimed by Lord Krishna in The Bhagvad Geeta, which he had adopted as a way of life. Being a Vishnavite he strongly believed that all said and done life is a celebration.

When he was in the high school, one day during the visit of education inspector, he misspelled the word ‘kettle’ and refused to adhere to the recommendation of the class teacher to copy it from the student next to him, as he felt that such an act was not right. Such clarity of mind and intimacy to truth was evident in his life right from childhood as an indication that he was destined to cross the barriers of ordinary human limitations.

He strongly believed in the universality of human soul, and the necessity to treat all human beings alike as part of that Universal Soul or “the children of God” in his own words. He strongly believed that “everything must be sacrificed if necessary for that one sentiment, universality”. This is a principle known to all Hindus and all human beings with average common sense irrespective of caste, creed, geographic, economical, or social identity.

The Mahatma has proved to the world the importance of self-discipline for greater achievements in life through the principle of “simple living and high thinking”, and how an ordinary person can become extra ordinary, how a poor and the weak can take on a mighty opponent, even if it’s an empire equipped with huge military, armaments, excellent political, and social management skills at its disposal.

At a time when there was no technological advancement, television, internet, computers, or social media platforms, a letter posted almost anywhere in India and most parts of the world would have reached him, even if only his photograph was affixed in place of address. Such enigmatic charisma has been rare in human history.

When he was thrown out of the train at Martizburg station in South Africa by the British officer, any common man in his position would have dusted his back and gone home, to look after his own business. He, on the contrary, took the opportunity to prepare for a long-term war against oppression. He could master-mind the moral war against the British with only peace and non-violence as tools, apart from a strong belief in selfless service, which truly has resulted in saving the lives of millions in the struggle for independence in India. For the poor destitution is the strength, for the oppressed the struggle and the survival instinct are the strengths, and they are more vital than armaments.

The contribution he has made in empowering the oppressed is unique. In reality we should call him ‘father of humanity’ as he is an inspiration even today to millions all over the world. It will be difficult for the coming generations to believe that such a great human being has ever lived among us in real life and blood.

All over the world he is being talked about in colleges, universities, management institutes, and even at government level, making him a source of inspiration to make this world a better place to live. Other than Shakespeare he is a personality on whom maximum books have been written which occupy voluminous space in the libraries across the world.

He was above religion, above family, even above nation, and he was a leader of humanity and a product of divine creation. He has also been the real inspiration to world leaders like late Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela, and many living legends include Barrack Obama, Suu Ki, and many more. The impact he has made on humanity with his principle of peace and nonviolence is the unique contribution anyone has made for humanity in the last more than 100 years, and his principle of universal brotherhood would have fetched him Nobel Prize for Peace, had he been in any other country of the world.

It is high time that we teach the total Gandhi in our schools and colleges by introducing a separate subject on him, like Shakespeare in English Literature, rather than histories of violent kings and rulers, to make our children better human beings, and the world a better place to live. Today’s generation suffering from thought pollution badly need his ideologies.

The material and scientific progress of humanity have failed to provide happiness and bliss humans have always yearned for. People are more and more realizing the fact that there is some missing link beyond, there is some lack of meaning in life over and above these awesome achievements, leading to the realization of the fact that possibly the value systems pursued by leaders like Gandhi may help people to fill the gaps in life. Gandhian philosophy, if adopted in practical life, may find solutions to many unanswered questions in human life.

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Further Readings: 1. My Experiments With Truth (Autobiography of MK Gandhi), 2. Gandhi On Personal Leadership by Anand Kumaraswamy, 3. The Life and Death of Mahatma Gandhi by Robert Payne.

HEARTBEATS 2021 : Who Dares Question Our Intelligence?

DEDICATION: To my mother beloved who, I am sure, eternally holds my hands

When it was reported that the attention span of gold-fish has become more than human beings, with twelve seconds and nine seconds respectively, the possible cause was attributed to the impact of social media making human brain redundant.  With abundance of knowledge and information floating around on the social media platforms available on the press of a button, the thrill of human brain to seek knowledge and enrich life has become less and less challenging.  Although in reality knowledge goes one way and life the other, the human challenge was to become more and more knowledgeable in life.  This thrill of life we are losing day by day due to knowledge explosion.

However, the reality is not so bad as per the reports in the Journal of Memory Study.   Research by Prof. Risko and Gilbert 2016 of two groups, one experts in using Google and the other with less expertise, it was found that the group who could use Google faster performed well than the other.  Yes, of course, the usage pattern of data through the social media has acquired momentum compared with the olden era of memorization.  In fact, just like the fire created by ancient man by rubbing stones life has taken us to LED bulbs, bullock carts to rockets, and so on, social media has transformed human life by leaps and bounds.  It is an alternative route discovered by human beings, called ‘cognitive off-loading’ and is the modern method of enhanced human intelligence.  It opened up a new vista, a new world, a new era, and a new trend for the human mind to explore.

Has availability of knowledge on finger tips actually reduced the human intelligence?  Actually not, as it opens up new and intelligent areas for the brain to explore.  The researchers ask a question, whether the calculators, computers,and other gadgets have actually reduced the capacity and intelligence of humans? No it has happened the other way because the world has become  a big platform.

Today my six-year-old grandson possess latest knowledge in making use of social media and finding answers to any problem.  The challenges also have increased.  People with specialized skills are in demand.  Those who can’t keep pace with the change have to be left out.  It will have the impact of virtual world affecting human body in different levels necessitating people with different skill levels to tackle them.  All the mechanical and at all levels repeat actions with no value additions are being subjected to automation.  Robots and new technologies are taking over the workplaces.  People across the world are loosing jobs.  The dictum “keep pace or be left our” has become a reality.

Today in many developed countries you won’t find people breaking rock pieces by hand in a road making process.  You won’t find a road roller with stone wheels.  Similarly you will find all workplaces getting transformed. It’s a pace of life.  The changes nobody can stop.  In fact the change is the perpetual factor.

My opinion is that the human intelligence has multiplied and it has developed the capabilities to handle multi tasking and meeting deadlines to achieve the objectives.  Only the life is shifting to a different level, probably the human body isexperiencing  limitations to withstand the virtual impacts.  Perhaps people are requuired to spend more energy, time, and resources to tackle the new life styles.  The mushrooming wellness clinics, gyms, investment patterns, life style changes, are staring at humanity with an unpredictable future.

HEARTBEATS invite you to open your heart and share your HEARTBEATS .  Let us start a discussion and enhance our knowledge to strengthen our capabilities to face the challenges of the future.  Please offer your comments on this site.  Thanks.

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HEARTBEATS 2021:Man Is Working Against Himself!

There will be no human being who, at least once, has not thought of committing suicide. This is due to the faculty of ability to think, judge, and evaluate, and the thing called intelligence.  This ability also ignites the ego or the process of feeling proud of one’s achievements and inability to face failure.  In the absence of this thinking process, human being will be living like other animals with the common purpose of eat and mate, and there will be no occasions for emotional imbalances.  You can’t find a tiger or a lion got dejected and committed suicide irrespective of the number of times they fail to get a prey, there is nothing called failure in their life.  .

The Police Horse Shaktiman which was brutally attacked by a member of Parliament in the state of Haryana in India in the recent past is an example of heightened human ego.  The expressions of the MP in the video give rise to an impression that the horse is an enemy of humans and the MP a savior.  The attack has resulted in amputation of its leg, and the horse could only stand for days before it succumbed to death.  Since Shaktiman is an official member of the police staff, an attack on it is actually an attack on the police force.

The fact that the horse was a means of mobility of human beings, much before the automobiles were invented, and it has been instrumental in transforming the lives of humans in the universe, actually demanded gratitude and support from humans, though it may not mean anything  today after the invention of supersonic jets and rockets.  In such circumstances, if humans become extremely egoistic and nurture the tendency to ignore the horse, it is natural, though deplorable on the part of humans.

There have been ordinary human beings in history who have proved themselves as extra ordinary like Alexander Graham Bell who invented the phone, Thomas Alva Edison who authored about 1100 discoveries most useful to humans, Isaac Newton who invented the gravitational pull of the earth, and many more.  They have been the torch bearers of human progress.  Along with all these gifted humans there have also been people like Adolf Hitler, Idi Amin, Alexander the Great, Napoleon, and many others who have adopted the aggressive way of life and spent their lives to prove their worth, and at the same time we also had ideologists like the Mahatma, Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela, and the like who have led humanity to the path of oneness and love.  We have seen that the word God has emerged from ‘good’, and the word Devil has emerged from ‘evil’.  Thanks to Osho the revolutionary mystic and writer who has advocated this concept.  The fact is that God and Devil have existed all along side by side and will continue toi do so.

Human beings have experienced the menace of slavery and its impacts from ages, and though we claim to have eliminated slavery, actually it exists in various forms even in modern society, even inside our houses, though the life styles of humans have tremendously improved and progressed over the years, thanks to the efforts of some planners, policy makers, and administrators, who continuously worked on education, freedom of expression, civil liberties, and human rights due to which we have been able to enjoy quality life in many part of the world.

We have also seen that, apart from slavery, the industrialization process from the sixteenth century that our factories were mostly working with the hard labor of children. Children were made to work even for 18 hours a day in our factories, while all the fruits of economic progress were being enjoyed by the few who were owners of the factories.  Acute poverty, and sufferings have forced the parents to surrender to the temptations to put their children to work, and even today we find such stray cases  here and there.

Therefore, child labour, slavery, human trafficking, and exploitation of the weak and infirm, have been the areas of interest for many from time immemorial, and we have not been able to overcome these negativities of human nature completely.  Actually these negativities exist in different shapes and forms blocking the progress of humanity, in spite of continuous efforts of many to get them eliminated.  Like the horse which was a pride possession of humans such negativities too have existed and existence of terrorism, religious hatred, atrocities on fellow humans, and cruelty towards animals, all are examples.

Today we have to recognize the presence of far more superior thinking process and we have really become universal personalities.  Today even young girls are seeking partnership in marriage rather than a one-sided social contract.  We have spent our resources, time, and energy to make our students, especially the down-trodden, able minded and conscious citizens, by showing them the Martyrs like Bhagat Singh who faced the gallows with smile as our heroes, and consequently when we find that student leaders like Kanhaya Kumar emerging as exemplary leaders, and when they point fingers at us, standing by the constitution and complying with our recommendation to ask questions, we are unable to bear.  However, how long can we go on breaking such fingers?  How long can we bear the somber and gloomy situation that we are in today.

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